Unnecessary Hullabaloo about BVN.

I've followed with great amusement and amazement the brouhaha over the expiration of the deadline for BVN registration.

Now, let me tell my personal story. I own three bank accounts (one for salary, one for business and one for nonsense!!!) I registered for BVN at Zenith Bank. It took me less than 10 minutes to complete the process. While on the way back to my office, I got an SMS alert notifying me that I've registered and my number would soon be sent to me. 24 hours later, it was all done and dusted. I became a proud owner of a BVN. LoL.

Then, I logged on to GT Bank Online and in less than 2 minutes linked the two accounts. I dare, even at the risk of being accused of being "reached", that my GT is still the best bank in Nigeria! They make online and in-shop banking so easy and an experience to look forward to. Eh, where's Mr. Agbaje and his PR guys. I need to hear from y'all.

First Bank, my BIG, STRONG RELIABLE, started sending text messages from way back asking customers who have registered to send abc to xyz code. I did it and it was confirmed, and I'm cool.

Now what's the issue with this very easy process? Nothing. As in, I really see nothing wrong with it or anything difficult about it. It's just been encumbered, so to say, by the usual Nigerian syndrome.

While some folks were plain lazy to go to their bank and register and kept procrastinating, others were afraid. Now, this latter group come in three very distinctively ludicrous species.

One: Politically exposed people are afraid to get BVN-ed, for fear their stolen wealth would be exposed.

Two: Regular criminals are concerned that the illicit inflows into their accounts would be traced and tracked.

Three: Some Pastors have told their members that BVN is not very dissimilar to the apocryphal "mark of the Beast", and the gullible morons bought into it and hoped the CBN would cancel the idea.

Well, it's sad we are the way we are. It's either Nigeria is gravely under-banked or the number of people willing to do the right thing is abysmally out of syncs with the legendary spirit of industry of the people. Judging by the number of people who have so far registered, as a percentage of the population, that is.

So, the die is cast and the time is up. Game over, ladies and gentlemen! Your account is in TWL (Time Window Lock) huh? Any bank customer without BVN is now deemed "Inadequate KYC" until they complete registration. So, go and register or you are snookered, because while your account will still be receiving inflows, you won't be able to withdraw or pay from the account from every platform.

For the churchious clowns, you'll have to forfeit all you kept in the bank, and then bank henceforth under your pillows and mattresses and inside drawers and cupboards. God will surely protect your money!

For the politically exposed, Ntoor! All your accounts and those of your proxies are now linked and traceable and if you avoid BVN you avoid or, more appropriately, forfeit your loot.

Seriously, the BVN will make life a lot easier. It will reduce fraud and facilitate easy banking operations.

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